October 17th, 2008

My Dragon Necklace


            My port hurts.  It bugs me every so often with a slight twinge of soreness, but today it’s being exceptional. I wonder if it has anything to do with my period? The way I’ve been hunkered over a lot today? The fact that I’ve felt super full thus….thus I don’t know.


            Thus’ are overrated. 


            Anyway, I’ve been allowed to start eating regular foods now. I’ve ventured into broccoli and it went down pretty well.  It was steamed. I also had a bit of pineapple.  That went down easy as well.

            The other night we had sushi and to my surprise it went down pretty easily. Not to my surprise it’s hard to eat in little bits.  I didn’t get sashimi or anything raw because I couldn’t stomach the idea of chewing something raw 30 effin’ times.


            Can I say ewwwww!!!!!


            My encounter with sushi though, has made me think about my taste buds relationship to food. I understand now that I like sushi when you can gulp it down. The individual ingredients eaten at one is pretty exquisite. Having to eat it parcel by parcel though, not so near exquisite. It may even be a tad blah.

            I’ve kind of resigned myself to the fact that sushi will probably leave my cuisine of choice. Someone suggested California rolls if I get to craving sushi. That’s an idea. They are small and should be easier to eat than say a Spider Roll. 

            I don’t really know though. I haven’t had my first fill yet so I don’t even know if I can stomach the rice later.

            I do know that I’m not really going to mourn the loss of sushi. I thought I might because I’ve always loved, loved, loved it. At the moment though, not so much.

             I do know that my food choices,  bit by bit as they cross my tongue  are changing. The slower I eat, the more I chew, the longer food actually stays in my mouth the more I realize certain foods are not as tasty as they once were, simply because I can’t gulp them down.  

            It also makes me understand that I haven’t really been tasting food all of this time. I’ve gone gah-gah over certain dishes. I’ve plowed into the tastiest things. I’ve always thought I was a connoisseuse  of food, I really, really did. But I might as well say the same about wine, a beverage I do not partake in.


            I’ve never tasted the full nuance of what I put into my mouth. I’ve never given myself the chance to.  Having to eat slowly makes me do this and it makes my appreciate food in a way I never have before.  I think for the first time in my overeating, fat assery way of life, I am a true foody.


            Can you be a foody and lose weight? Sure can. I don’t think eating less means you enjoy food less. In fact I think I’m starting to enjoy food more. Having to choose carefully, having to know exactly what I want, makes me make wiser choices. 

            I still have to up the wise in my food choices though. Right now, I’m going through a phase of rediscovery. I’m having to relearn to feed myself and learn what my new self can actually digest. I’m lucky I haven’t yet had too much trouble.  But my goals are still chewing even more than I am and eating more slowly than I do. I have no restriction yet and I have to prepare for it.


            So, my first fill is November 12th. I’m going to haul ass in and get the pokies, when I come out I think I’ll finally know what all this Lap-Band business is really about. 


            I’m out. I’ve got so much to do at the moment. Have fun one and all.








© 2008